Excuses

Hello Readers,

During the course of our lives we are often unprepared for the unexpected, the sort of events that prove life changing and dramatically alter the course of our destiny forever. Its so easy to just sit there complaining how bored, fed up and tired we are with our daily grind, chanting ‘new day, same rubbish, new day, same rubbish’ or, ‘everyone else seems to lead a more exciting life than me’ and feel like ‘Cinderella’ forlorn and full of woe.

And then, suddenly, one day, your whole life is transformed by perhaps a telephone call, a visit to the doctor, an accident, bereavement, relationship breakdown, lottery win, redundancy, the list is endless, you know at that point that nothing can ever be the same again. You go into shock, emotional melt down, euphoria, panic, despair, elation, you know what I mean? Life can be absolutely daunting at times, challenging us to our absolutely limits. It not only tests our strengths, it also well and truly tests our relationships.

Its also at this point that we discover our true friends, the ones who will downs tools and be there at our side when we really need help. These are the friends who will arrive with an overnight bag, comforting food and a big hug to let you know that you are not struggling alone. These friends do not need to be asked to do anything. They alter their diaries, they phone, text, e mail and arrive on the doorstep because they know only too well what it is like to find themselves in dire straits. They can be counted on and only have your interests at heart. They do not have their own agenda. They put their troubles to one side and don’t even moan about them because you are the person they love and want to help when the going gets tough.

However, I must also use this point to remind you that there are other so called friends who will not even show up or put themselves out to help. These are often the sort who will say ridiculous things like ‘ If you need anything, phone’, bearing in mind that they may not have their own transport or go on about their own physical ailings, giving excuses, not reasons why they find it too much trouble to assist. The ‘Fair Weather’ variety will happily quote ‘We will have to get together, you you must pop over when you are feeling better’, and you don’t see hide not hair of them. You might get the odd blank greeting card, but no proper communication or offer of constructive help, which is what is desperately needed when someone is down a deep well and frightened of their own future. (I have recently heard an excuse of…’well, I would visit but I have a bad foot’, or some other idiotic story that holds no substance. Bear in mind that these people are the ones who complain that no one ever goes to see them nor offers help when they are in a mess. In fact, very often, they are of the opinion that asking or accepting help is a form of weakness and because they detest weakness, they never offer their time, but, they will happily ‘take’.

I am sure what I am talking to you about comes as no surprise to many of you reading this because you will have already experienced such disappointment and worse, but its better to know who is on your side and who isn’t. Its better to remain loyal to those who show loyalty rather than chase after those who are not worthy of your tears or friendship.

Remember, you can choose who you want to be friends with. You don’t have to answer every single e mail, text or telephone call if you don’t instinctively feel that its right to. I always say, go with your gut feelings and you wont go wrong. In my experience, I have found silence is golden and speech is silver. Why waste energy on people who are not worthy of your friendship. Stick to the ‘tried and tested’, but also during your difficult and sometimes crazy journey in life you will meet complete new strangers from the most unexpected sources who are kind, generous and good hearted that offer unconditional help, friendship, understanding, compassion, loyalty and anything else that is needed who over a period of time become more important in your future than the ones who have miserably let you down.

There is always a reason for everything, yet at the time its almost impossible to see the wood for the trees. By keeping an open mind and heart, you will be surprised to discover just what lies around the next corner that isn’t all hideous, but that there is always a silver lining to every dark cloud.

I have learned through my own life to count my blessings one by one. None of us have it easy all the time nor rough all the time. Its the Wheel of Life that continually spins, but the friends and loved ones that matter, will always be at your side, with their own good reasons why they want to spend time with you and offer help, not full of week feeble excuses.

Until Next Week,
Love and Light,
Linda and The Lulas xxx